Archive for the ‘women and money’ Category

 

I seem to be reading about leadership everywhere these days, and I love it!

I had a wonderful surprise with starting Steve Farber’s new book, which I down loaded on my ipad and started reading yesterday.  I don’t want to say much more, other than ‘do the same’ as I may spoil your surprise.  What I resonated with, in addition to the words, was a sense of Steve’s presence and the personal touch that made the experience of reading the book exceptional for me.

This morning on LinkedIn, one of the articles (from Forbes) was entitled “New Leaders: To Make Your Mark, Do Nothing” and it spurred my thinking to the area of ‘mistakes’ or ‘do overs’.

As a leader, I have made tons of mistakes and experience many OS!Moments!  One of my main mistake and the biggest thing I would like to ‘do over’, is to “do nothing” in an organization for about 6 months or longer.  This would give me a chance to get a sense of the culture, the people, the informal rules, the energy of the system, so to speak.  It would also clearly say that my personality, my energy is only a small part of the whole system and would speak to a collaborative leadership style.

I wonder too, if due to the gender divide and the history of an imbalance in women, success and power relative to our male counterparts, women are more afraid than men to make mistakes in leadership and err on safety?  Does being safe as a leader mean being stagnant as an organization?

I would love to hear from women leader’s as to what your main ‘mistake’/'do over’ would be!  Please share!  From our sharing, we can learn, grow and support each other!

in peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Topaz Lotus Life & Leadership Coaching for Women

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

 

Women’s Leadership Tip

Continuing the discuss of the ‘being’ and ‘doing’ of women’s leadership…

Leadership can and should be crazy, magic, awful and wonderful, just like life!

‘What the double hockey sticks’ you may be thinking!

In life, coaches know that the messiness and hard parts are often the ‘gateways’ to amazing personal, spiritual and professional growth!

It is the same with leadership.

Steve Farber, extreme leadership guru and author of ‘Radical Leap: re-energized’ was a keynote speaker at the International Coach Federation Conference I attended in Las Vegas recently. Steve talks about the ‘OS!M’ and this does not refer to open source! He refers to the interplay of love and fear and encourages leaders to experience an ‘oh s#*t!moment’ frequently.

In my experience in coaching and in leadership, these moments are frequent and scary and authentic and real and edgy and if one stays mindful with the process, can catalyze transformation, personally and organizationally!

So, play around with OS!M this week in life and work.

Read more on Steve’s website, click on ‘Pursue the OS!M’

In peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Life & Leadership Quote of the Week!

‘If you do things well, do them better. Be daring, be first, be different, be just’

~ Anita Roddick – Founder of The Body Shop

 

Enjoy your wonderful day and life!

 

In peace and mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Topaz Lotus Life & Leadership Coaching for Women

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

Invitation

From the School of Sacred Arts:

“The School of Sacred Arts is a Yoga Alliance registered yoga school offering
Yoga teacher trainings, retreats and workshops throughout the world.”

(Shel Silverstein, from “Where the Sidewalk ends”)

 

I personally resonate with this center of sacred studies as one of the founders is Canadian (as am I) and there is a blend of the ancient teachings of yoga, Ayurveda and tantra.  My dream is to attend one of their yoga teacher trainings in Bali!

 

Enjoy your day and may we all be filled with loving kindness!

 

In peace and mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Topaz Lotus Life & Leadership Coaching for Women

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

In previous writing, I referred to the Topaz Lotus Leadership Matrix for Women; the ‘art & science’ or the ‘being and doing’ of leadership for women.  I use the Legacy Leadership Model as the foundation for the ‘doing’ of women’s leadership.  Of course this model is powerful and dynamic for all to use!

 

I have designed the topaz lotus leadership matrix specifically for women as in my work as a leader and as an executive, life, leadership coach, I have found that some women struggle with their process as a leader.  Some women try and simply replicate a leadership style that they have seen used before.  Others struggle with the idea that they don’t have a formal role as a leader, yet, exhibit exceptional leadership skills.  Others just aren’t sure of what their leadership style is.

I have personally found , as have many of my clients that the Legacy Leadership process brings clarity and support to women in leadership!

Best Practice #2 (from the Legacy Leadership Model)

Creator of Collaboration and Innovation: about the environment of working relationships

The question to ask yourself is: how do I create an environment of collaboration and innovation in my workplace?  One can also use this question in one’s personal life too!

Enjoy your wonderful day!  Here’s to collaboration and innovation!

 

in peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Topaz Lotus Life & Leadership Coaching for Women

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

International Women’s Day is coming and some of the things that connect us all are the ways we adorn ourselves and use art, jewelry, clothing and ink to give special meaning to our lives!

Some women use henna tattoos prior to marriage as symbolic adornment. Some women wear necklaces and earrings, some women have tattoos, some adorn themselves with third eye art; I have created my own ‘sacred stack’ bracelet and each one has a special and sacred meaning to me.

My personal sacred wrist stack includes a pearl & leather bracelet made by an artist in Sayulita and it reminds me of how much I love traveling in Mexico; a fragrant rosewood mala from Tiny Devotions which reminds me of all the different Spiritual traditions and how these traditions meet ‘in the middle’, 3 Satya bracelets, 2 crystals, one wood with a lotus, tree of life & Om which remind me of my own spirituality, the heart and soul and that we are all connected and also that there is a Soul-Sisterhood in the world as I have become connected with the women where I purchased these, 3 small beaded Love Pray bracelets which reminds me of the spirit of entrepreneurship and all my virtual friends & an individual twist of a beaded necklace that I added which reminds me that I am unique, creative and whole! The bracelet circles remind me of the circle of life and that we are all connected!

 

A huge acknowledgement to the women artists and women entrepreneurs who have created these amazing pieces of  sacred jewelry and who have connected with other women to market and sell their jewelry!  Women in small business support many families around the world!

And, a special thanks and shout out to the yoga studios who have carried some of this wonderful jewelry; Chantal and Shanti Yoga in Tsawwassen and Semperviva Yoga Kitsilano Studio in Vancouver.

May your day be filled with sacred delight and soul-sisterhood!

in peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Topaz Lotus Life & Leadership Coaching for Women

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

“Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan the flames.” ~ Rumi

 

One of the first areas we covered during my coach training was a personal exploration of our life ‘values and needs’ and how these play out in our personal and professional lives and life work balance.

 

For clarity and common understanding:

Values:  Values are the essence of who we are.  Values are principles that you hold to be of worth in your life.  Values are those things considered right, worthwhile, and desirable- the basis of guiding principles and standards.  Values tend to stay the same throughout life and provide the basis for how we live our lives.

A further distillation….

Crystal Values: a value that is so important to you that if it is not incorporated into your life causes your life to shatter.  Think of what happens if you drop a crystal ball.

 

Rubber Values: a value that is important but that can bounce away and then back again without you feeling dissonance.

 

Needs:  Needs are different than values.  A need is ‘a condition or situation in which something is required or wanted.’ (from the ‘free online dictionary’).  Needs change throughout one’s life and life situation.  There is an understanding through the coaching, psychological, emotional, social intelligence fields,  that adults are 100% responsible for ensuring their needs are met in a healthy way.

 

When I start working with a new coaching client, one of the first things we work on is to develop clarity about their values and needs and once there is clarity, the coaching question is:  ’are you living your life from a foundation of clear and strongly held values or from a place of unmet needs.?’  This question often catalyzes a very interesting discussion!

 

The benefit of clarity in values is a strong life foundation from which to make decisions and to act as personal guidance in how you choose friends, a job, a life partner for example.

Dissonance occurs when one’s personal values are out of sync with other elements in one’s life.  A good example of this is in a work situation where an individual has a strongly held value of ‘sustainability’ and protection of the environment and then finds out that their employer is dumping toxic waste.  Another example of this type of dissonance is when a workplace has stated values, however, these are not followed and the actions of the organization are out of sync with the organizations stated values.  This type of dissonance is a common cause of work place and occupational stress.

Values dissonance in one’s personal life often  shows up  most clearly in relationships.  A personal life example of  values dissonance  is illustrated by the ‘new couple’, where one of them strongly values ‘family’ and the other strongly values ‘freedom & flexibility’.  Friction may arise when the value of ‘family’ (Sunday night dinners with the extended family) bumps up against the value of ‘freedom and flexibility’ (freedom to ‘on the spur of the moment’ take weekends off to go hiking) for example.

 

So, values are involved in how we live and needs are involved in how we act!

 

It is very common to use relationships to try to get our un-met needs met and this is very natural if one is in a relationship that is consciously agreed upon by all, for example in a friendship, a family relationship, a romantic relationship.  It gets much trickier in the work situation as the relationships are tacitly agreed upon.

Some of the classic examples are folks using their work relationships  with colleagues to meet their un-met need for ‘emotional connection’ and companionship in their personal life, using an older colleague to help meet unmet needs for ‘nurturing’ from parents, using the organization to help meet unmet needs for ‘recognition’ from one’s family of origin.

You will know if someone is using you to get their un-met needs met if you feel an ‘energy drain’ in their presence, like your life force is being literally sucked right out of you.  These folks are sometimes referred to as ‘energy vampires’!  Another way to know if un-met needs are ‘at play’ is if there is a perception of conflict or edginess; the expression that is often used here is that these people are ‘growing up all over each other.’

 

Benefits of having clarity on one’s needs are: you can learn to get your needs met in a respectful and honoring way by integrating them into your career/life; recognize they are a unique part of you; learn to clearly ask for what you need; feel whole and complete when you take responsibility for getting your needs met; maximize life fulfillment by honoring your needs.

 

Having clarity about your values and needs is the key!  Clarity leads to self awareness, self-responsibility and work life balance.

 

Reflect on your values and needs and here’s a life and  leadership coaching tip, write it all down!  Get a special journal or create a new folder in your computer and consider: your life purpose/mission; values (both crystal and rubber); needs; what and who are the people, places, actions and activities that nourish you and deepen your life fulfillment and meaning?

 

in peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

Topaz Lotus Life & Leadership Coaching for Women

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul 

 

“Set your life on fire.  Seek those who fan the flames.” ~ Rumi

 

Some words of wisdom to start your day!

“Live with intention.
Walk to the edge.
Listen Hard.
Practice wellness.
Play with abandon.
Laugh.
Choose with no regret.
Appreciate your friends.
Continue to learn.
Do what you love.
Live as if this is all there is.”

By Mary Anne Radmacher (author and artist)

Enjoy your day my friends,

in peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

topaz lotus wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

The Guest House

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all
Even if they are a cloud of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each guest has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

~~~

This is one of my favorite poems! I have found that the more I welcome every visitor, the lighter and airier my ‘house’ becomes, there is a freshness and newness with each day and it is easier to greet each visitor with laughter!  This is not to say that it has been easy!  I have found it really hard to ‘welcome’ emotional pain, or perceived wrong doings by someone close to me.  While ithasnotbeen easy, I have found a deepening sense of enrichment coming to my life.

Enjoy your day and as a guest to my blog, lets share a laugh together with this adorable child and camel! This picture I found on facebook, I don’t know who took it, however I would love to acknowledge the photographer.

in peace and mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

Don’t be a woman going crazy at work, learn sustainable marketing strategies with a hippie marketer and reduce your stress at work.

Check out Tad Hargraves workshops in Vancouver tonight and this weekend!

Tad specializes in helping values based business owners and hippie women entrepreneurs who wish to earn with integrity while being socially responsible.

In peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire & soothe your soul