Posts Tagged ‘leadership coaching for women’

A beautiful photo to share with you on a Good Friday Full Moon!

I found this photo on f/b and would live to know who the artist is!

namaste,

Zoey

 

The photo brings to mind a woman’s spirituality & loving kindness!

Continuing with the story about women and the heart….

Some background;  for the past 20 years or so, I have been delving into what used to be called ‘New Age Spirituality’, and now I simply call it ‘my spirituality’.  My spirituality feels like a personal and unique blend of Christianity and Buddhism, with hints of other major religions thrown in with a lot of meditation and yoga.  I’ve read many self help, personal development, integral theory, and new age spirituality books.  As a working mom and professional woman, I did a mid-life career shift (after a couple of decades working as a Nutritionist ) and took professional training into life & leadership coaching, using a body centered, whole systems orientation.

About three years ago, my husband informed me that two ‘suspicious spots’ had been seen on his lung.  Not long after, I attended a seminar about critical illness insurance for the self-employed business woman and decided I needed to take out this type of insurance as I had a family history of both cancer and heart disease.  We were in a state of hopeful/hopeless anticipation of the results of his lung biopsy.  To add to the health concern, my husband had also developed pulmonary emboli also known as lung clots, in both lungs.

As one may imagine, I was very worried about my husband, about our family, about how I would support three daughters as a professional woman if my husband died.  My mind utilizes ‘worst case scenarioizing’ very well!  At the time I was 51 years old.

I was also going through menopause and was taking a compounded progesterone for the symptoms.

We had just returned from a sailing trip where we had ‘weathered’ a significant storm of over 40 km per hour winds and where our engine had almost failed, resulting in a very scary couple of hours on the water with an accompanying surge of adrenalin.

To re-cap, between us; we had money worries due to reduced income, health worries, significant additional stress, menopause, three daughters to support and help with college, possible lung cancer, a really bad scare, pulmonary emboli and a recently purchased critical illness policy.  I also found out later that I had undiagnosed ‘essential hypertension’ or high blood pressure. I had ‘gained a few pounds’ over the past years although I regularly exercised, was a non smoker and drinker and ate in a healthy way!  I looked pretty healthy for my age.

I engaged in daily meditation and walks and was reading a lot of Buddhist teachings about ‘keeping the heart open’ and  without actually being trained in the practice, using a breathing practice called tonglen , where you breathe in the pain of the world and breathe out clear healing love.

What happened was that I was ‘broken hearted’!  My heart literally broke!

On a Monday morning after a ‘power walk’ and coffee, I experienced shortness of breath and felt like an elephant was sitting on my chest.  This heavy sensation wasn’t in any way painful, but it was uncomfortable.  I had a tiny bit of pain in my neck and right shoulder.  The ‘heavy’ sensation came and went about three times after which I googled ‘symptoms of a heart attack in women’.  I basically had all the symptoms and had my daughter drive me to the hospital half of me thinking that I was having a panic attack and in my mind, calling myself a ‘drama queen’ and the other half, the holistic health half saying ‘listen to your body and take this seriously’!  I’m very fortunate that I did listen to my inner wisdom and trust my body’s messages!

I was not having a panic attack, I had in fact had a ‘spontaneous coronary artery dissection (SCAD)’, where an flap of tissue from inside my heart artery tore off the wall of the heart and blocked the blood flow, resulting in a heart attack or MI.  I found out later that this type of heart attack is diagnosed in 70% of the cases upon autopsy and is not very common.  It happens more often in women and is associated with stress and changes in hormones and blood pressure. It has sometimes been called  ’Japanese Widows Syndrome’, as when a Japanese woman would suffer a heart attack  and die, just after her husband’s death!  In the hospital, my Cardiologist, Dr. Hamburger said that I had a ‘broken heart’, likely in some part caused by stress about my husband. If you google ‘SCAD’, you will find much more information

This may all sound very sad and upsetting and yes, it is and it was.  However, as a result of all of the above, our lives are better and we will live healthier and longer!  I can summarize the good results as:

- my ‘essential hypertension’ and ‘Syndrome X’ was diagnosed and I am now on appropriate medication.

- my husband was found to have a ‘clotting deficiency’ and likely would have died young from a heart attack but is now on the appropriate medication.

- as a result of thinking he had ‘lung cancer’ (he doesn’t) , my husband’s doctor reacted very quickly to my husband’s back pain (caused by the blood clots in his lung), which likely save his life.

- we both made further major healthy lifestyle changes.

- I received a significant critical illness claim which has helped tremendously with our daughters’ post secondary education!

- I have developed a very healthy respect for the power of spiritual practices and am daily reminded of what a beginner I am!

- I appreciate every day that I am alive and my family is well.

- I still chuckle that a former dietitian (moi)  would have a Cardiologist named Dr. Hamburger!

- I tell my story to help inform other women about heart disease, the symptoms of a heart attack in women and SACAD, so that any woman feeling ‘weird sensations’ (heaviness, difficulty catching your breath, tightness in chest, shortness of breath)  in her chest, will go immediately to the closest hospital emergency ward!  Please check with your local health authority for a complete list of heart attack symptoms in women.  In Canada, the Heart and Stroke Foundation is a great resource!

- I practice meditation and yoga and have a wonderful life!  I’m not quite sure what to make about the financial windfall part of this, however, I believe the ‘law of attraction’ was at play!

My life lessons from this experience?

- trust your inner wisdom

- listen to your body messages

- we are more connected than we think

- the mind body connection is powerful!

- trust that even though sad things happen, there is a bigger stronger more powerful loving force at work!

- the law of attraction is powerful!

- women are wise

- sometimes bad things turn out to be good things

- pay attention to life work balance

- have fun, be joyful, love!

Please share this information with other women and be aware that heart disease and stroke are big health issues for women and take good care of your heart and your health!

 

in peace & mindfulness,

namaste,

Zoey

 

Have you heard about a type of ‘heart attack’ or ‘myocardial infarction (MI)’ called a ‘spontaneous coronary artery dissection or SACAD’?

It is literally the type of heart attack where the heart is broken!

I know because I have had one!

The month of February holds Valentines Day and is also Heart & Stroke Month in Canada. Did you know that Canadian women are more likely to die of heart attacks and stroke than anything else? Even though we are better informed about health and are generally healthier, there are still gaps in our understanding of heart disease.

Over the coming week, I want to tell you more about SACADs so that you will be aware of this type of heart attack as well as more well known types of heart disease.

Stay tuned!

In peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

 

“To live in accord with love is to set your heart on fire. In the crucible of such an inferno all convention burns away. What’s left is an entirely new kind of existence, one full of passion, presence, and infinite possibility.” - Raphael Cushnir

 

 

 

 

“Even the most exalted states and the most exceptionally spiritual accomplishments are unimportant if we cannot be happy in the most basic and ordinary ways, if we cannot touch one another and the life we have been given with our hearts.”

 

- Jack Kornfield from “A Path With Heart”

 

Happy Valentines Day and I hope that these quotes help to ‘set your heart on fire’ with love!

 

In peace & mindfulness,

namaste,

Zoey

 

 

 

 

Celebrate World Happy Day with a special screening of the movie “Happy” at the link below!

| World Happy Day.

 

 

namaste,

Zoey

From: the Unconditional Love Group on Facebook

To help you design & live your life like this, I would like to gift you with a free download of  the ‘Topaz Lotus Life Crafter 2012‘

 

In peace & mindfulness

namaste,

Zoey

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

 

 

 

I’m starting my work day off with some meditation, what about you?

 

I find that if I spend a few moments at my desk, in quietness and meditation, my day flows forward in a smoother way.

Here are some tips:

- start with some grounding exercises, feeling your feet solidly on the floor.

- take 3 cleansing breaths

- clear your mind

- focus on your breath, in out, in out.

- notice the space between your thoughts, what does it feel like.

- finish with 3 deep breaths

- come back to your day.

 

Envision your day flowing smoothly with joy and ease!

 

namaste,

 

Zoey

 

coaching for your heart and soul

Give yourself incredible self care! You deserve it!

And…

As a life coach for women, I suggest that you ‘put yourself at the top of the list’.  Many women struggle with this concept and consider it selfish, however, if you don’t take incredible care of yourself, how can you care for all those other special people in your life?

With self care and a caring attitude towards ones self, we tend to have more patience, energy and a strong life force.  Give it a try!

In peace & mindfulness.

namaste,

Zoey

wisdom coaching to set your heart on fire and soothe your soul

Women Health Life:  Words of Wisdom Heart of Wisdom – Integrity

“Don’t compromise yourself. You are all you’ve got.”
—Janis Joplin
We tend, through life, to be confronted with many ethical dilemmas where we need to draw on our personal codes and guiding principles.  These dilemmas may feel small or large, depending on the circumstance.  Part of “life coaching” is helping women develop clarity about their personal guiding principles and values.  I often suggest that clients ask themselves the following question; “can you live with yourself, with your integrity intact, if you make that decision”?

I found the following definitions of the word “integrity” to be very interesting (from: http://www.merriamwebster.com/dictionary/integrity)

1 : firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values : incorruptibility
2 : an unimpaired condition : soundness
3 : the quality or state of being complete or undivided : completeness

Most folks I talk with are familiar with then first definition, however, it is the third definition that I find fascinating, especially if one applies this to people not cell membranes! In ancient traditions one often hears about each person’s aura or “egg” of energy.  In psychological and mind/body terms, one talks about “containment” and the idea that the whole is greater than the sum of it’s parts.

What if we placed the emphasis on first “getting whole” and then making decisions; would that automatically mean we make integral decisions?

Now I know this discussion may seem ‘airy fairy’ to some, yet, it is a serious question.  If we design a practice and actions so that we have a “felt experience” of being whole, complete and contained, with all parts of us, mind, body, spirit and emotions connecting and integrated, then, I would say, we can’t help but function with integrity.

In our Western culture, we are encouraged to primarily use our mind in making decisions.  What if we also asked “what would my heart say about this”, or ”how does gut feel” with that decision?

In previous postings about being a sage or wise woman, I have discussed a variety of qualities from wisdom to power, from courage to gentleness; with incorporating the word “integrity” we add in both meanings of the word and draw on the concept of wholeness or completeness as well as a personal code of ethics.

So, you see, being a wise woman with integrity may encompass so much more than just being true to oneself.  Janis Joplin has half the equation!   Imagine a world where we all make decisions with both our head and our hearts for the purposes of deeper connection!

Luscious ladies, play around with the following questions
“Self-care Enchantments”:

1. 1. When have you experienced a challenge to your personal code of ethics?  How did you respond?
2. 2. Do you or how do you experience a sense of wholeness or containment?
3. 3. This week, when making a decision, run it through your head, your heart and your gut and see if the process feels different.

In peace & mindfulness,

namaste,

Zoey

Our world is changing, of that there is no doubt!  With hope, in the future, our children and grandchildren will be living in a world of peace, where a ‘partnership model’ rather than a ‘dominator model’ is in place.

Most women I know want to live a healthy lifestyle with purpose and passion.  From a place of  ’life in balance’,  they are the major decision makers in family health and kids health.  I know that as a working mother, I think often about what the future holds for myself, my family, my friends and my community.

We are seeing increasing numbers of women leaders in all areas.  Rather than replicate the mistakes of the past by using a dominator model, I urge all women, especially women in leadership to use a partnership model!

In considering these models and the future, it helps to review the key  ’organizing principles’ below:

• • command and control– think “military”.
• • competition – think “I win, you lose”.
• • cooperation – think “I scratch your back, you scratch mine”.
• • collaboration – think “win-win”.
• • co-creation – think “the whole is greater than the sum of it’s parts”.

A ‘Dominator  Model’ utilizes the first two and sometimes the third and a ‘Partnership Model’ utilizes primarily the last two.

Consider all the systems in the world today, ie political, military, corporate, business, educational, health care, religion.  Most of these systems are based on a ‘command and control’ model where there is a leader (most often male) and a triangle of power and control flowing down from the leadership level.  It is the dismantling of this model and the shift to new, healthier organizing principles that the ‘Occupy Movement” is all about for example.

Traditionally women naturally  draw on their heart and soul wisdom and use co-creation, collaboration and cooperation in their lives. For centuries, women have sat in a circle around a fire, over a cup of tea, around the children playing, chatting and throwing out ideas for simplifying and improving their lives and the lives of their families.  These models tremendously help to improve women health, family health, emotional intelligence and mental health.  This is indicated with current scientific research and not just with feminists!

As the world allows women of all ages and particularly elder women to play a more prominent role in all areas, ‘Women Power’ will increase for the good of us all.  Will we actually live in a “femocracy” or in more of a ‘collective partnership’?  We don’t know yet, however, it is important to teach our children the beauty of sitting in circle together, of ‘win-win-win’ and collective co-creative thinking.

Women leaders, base your leadership style of the last two principles and use the partnership model!  This will lend creativity, inspiration, innovation to your organization!

I call this all ‘matrixed heart and soul’ wisdom!  Enjoy your wonderful day!

In peace and mindfulness.

namaste,

Zoey